Here I am trying to figure you out. Every single day I devote much of my time doing my best to "get" you, to understand you, to know you and all of your most intimate intricacies and still, I am here wondering when. When will I ever truly understand? When will I ever fully comprehend why you throw such craziness into my path, why do you insist on making me feel so frail and small on some days and then on other days you build me up, make me feel that I can conquer anything, accomplish anything?
What is it you want from me, dear Life? I thought if I gave my heart, loved with passion, lived with passion that you would always help me to understand and to know just what all I am supposed to understand and to know. But sometimes--even though I am mid-way through my 5th decade with you, I still do not feel that I have the grasp that I should. What gives?
Oh, don't worry--I won't give up on you. (Not yet, anyway). There is far too much about you that I have still yet to explore, to see and do and to experience. I'm not about to cut you loose until I GET YOU and UNDERSTAND and COMPREHEND all that I feel so compelled to get, understand and comprehend.
And yes, I've heard tell that you can be a bitch, that you can be rough and that you can be hard--but I also know and have seen with my very own eyes that you can be kind, loving, awesome, wondrous and exciting and fun. So, don't think that just because I'm a bit confused about you and that I'm still trying to figure you out, that I'm giving up. I refuse to give up on you, dear Life. You're stuck with me until you decide that you are DONE with ME, got it?
I think that just about says it, huh????????
